Helen Laura Ritzmann (14 Aug 1911 – 22 May 1988) and Carlo Middaugh Paterno (23 Nov 1907 – 11 Dec 1995) were my maternal grandparents. Helen was adopted by her step-father Salvatore Albert Cotillo (19 Nov 1886 – 27 Jul 1939) when she was approximately 18 years of age. Helen’s mother Ida Sophia Berthold (15 May 1894 – 8 Jun 1977) married Judge Cotillo sometime between 1915 (divorce from first husband John Herbert Ritzmann) and 1929 when Helen was 18 years old and adopted. At this writing I do not have evidence of their recorded marriage.
“Helen Berthold Cotillo and Carlo Middaugh Paterno became engaged on her birthday of August 14, 1934. We married on my birthday on November 23, 1934. Her age was 23 and mine was 27.
Judge Cotillo performed a civil ceremony in his home [at 1172 Park Avenue] because of his great desire to do so. The formal Catholic service was held at the Castle in the evening.
The famous operatic diva, Rosa Ponselle, sang at our wedding. Ring bearer was the son of James A. Farley who was Postmaster General in the presidential cabinet of Franklin D. Roosevelt. The Postmaster General and his wife, Bess, were close friends of the Cotillos.
Our honeymoon night was spent in the Tower of the Hotel Waldorf-Astoria at 49th and Park Avenue. It was Glenn Lybarger, my boyhood mentor-confidante, who chauffeured us into the city prior to the honeymoon cruise.
Next day from wedding night in the Waldorf Towers, Helen and I embarked on the Grace Line’s Santa Rose for the long cruise from New York via the Panama Canal to the Pacific and up to Los Angeles. Here we took the ocean liner Luraline to Honolulu for a great time there. Our honeymoon was a half-year of newly married bliss.” Carlo M. Paterno in his book My Family page 53
Helen B. Cotillo to Wed in Autumn – Troth to Carlo M. Paterno to Be Made Public Formally at Birthday Luncheon – Parent Will Be Hosts – Prospective Bride Graduate of the New Rochelle, Castle and Finch Schools • Sunday, August 12, 1934
Supreme Court Justice and Mrs. Salvatore A. Cotillo will give a luncheon on Tuesday at the Westchester Court Club to celebrate the birthday of their daughter, Miss Helen Berthold Cotillo, and at the same time to announce formally her engagement to Carlo M. Paterno, son of Dr. and Mrs. Charles V. Paterno of this city and Mount Kisco, NY. Only close friends of both families will attend the luncheon.
Miss Cotillo attended the New Rochelle, Castle and Finch Schools. She is interested in social service work and finds recreation in horseback riding, swimming and golfing.
Mr. Paterno attended the Riverside Country and Milford Schools, and was graduated from the Sheffield Scientific School of Yale in 1930. He is a member of the Phi Gamma Delta and Vernon Hall, and a junior member of the Westchester Country Club. He is an expert horseman and golfer.
He is manager of the real estate holdings of his father , the well-known builder. Young Mr. Paterno is president of the 335 West One Hundred and First Street Corporation and vice president of the Karlopat Realty Corporation.
The marriage will take place in the Autumn.
The Evening Star, Washington, D. C. • Wednesday, August 15, 1934
Mrs. James A. Farley, wife of the Postmaster General, was the ranking guest at luncheon yesterday of Supreme Court Justice of New York and Mrs. Salvatore A. Cotillo, who entertained at the Westchester Country Club. The party was in celebration of the birthday anniversary of Miss Helen Berthold Cotillo, daughter of the hosts, and also to formally announce her engagement to Mr. Carlo M. Paterno, son of Dr. and Mrs. Charles V. Paterno of New York and Mount Kisco. Among others at the luncheon were Mr. Charles (Minnie) Paterno, Signora Grossardi, wife of the Italian consul general in New York; Mrs. Howard Chandler Christy and Miss Rosa Ponselle.
Luncheon Honors Helen B. Cotillo – Mrs. James A. Farley Hostess to Prospective Bride of Carlo M. Paterno • November 9, 1934
Mrs. James A. Farley gave a luncheon yesterday at the Central Park Casino for Miss Helen B. Cotillo, daughter of Supreme Court Justice and Mrs. Salvatore A. Cotillo, who marriage to Carlo M. Paterno will take place on Nov. 23 at Paterno Castle. The other guests were: Mrs. Cotillo, Mrs. Charles Paterno, Mrs. Thomas Sheridan, Mrs. John Dietz, Mrs. Harry Conay, Mr.s Howard Chandler Christy, Mrs. Gene Pope, Mrs. Henry Hughes, Mrs. Edward McDermott, Mrs. Daniel H. McKitterick, Mrs. James A. Foley, Mrs. Michael Delehanty, Mrs. Albert Frankenthaler, Mrs. C. Russell Feldman, Mrs. Frank Cooper, Mrs. Isadore Wasservogel, Miss Beth Leary and Miss Rosa Ponselle of the Metropolitan Opera Company.
Miss Cotillo Wed to C. M. Paterno – Daughter of Supreme Court Justice Married at Castle Overlooking Hudson – Ponselle Sisters Sing – Member of Bench, Bar, Congress and President’ Cabinet Are Among Notables Present • November 24, 1934
One of the largest weddings of the late Autumn season was that of Miss Helen Berthold Cotillo, elder daughter of Supreme Court Justice and Mrs. Salvatore A. Cotillo, to Carlo Middaugh Paterno, only son of Dr. and Mrs. Charles V. Paterno, which took place last night at The Castle, the medieval residence of the Paternos overlooking the Hudson, almost within a stone’s throw of the George Washington Bridge.
The ceremony took place in the large conservatory, which had been transformed into an outdoor garden by means of silver birch trees and tropical and subtropical plants. There was a temporary altar at one end of the room, arranged against a background of the birch trees and flanked by seven-branched cathedral candelabras, the lighted tapers casting a soft glow during the ceremony, performed by the Right Rev. Mgr. Alphonsus Arcese, who was assisted by the Rev. Salvatrore Cafiero. During the service Rosa Ponselle of the Metropolitan Opera Company sang “Oh, Promise Me.”
Miss Carmela Ponselle, also of the Metropolitan Opera Company, sang the wedding march from “Lohengrin” as the bridal party made its way from the hallway through the conservatory to the altar. The procession was led by two flower girls, Sally Cotillo [Sarah Leticia Campbell Cotillo], sister of the bride, and Ruth Brown, grand-neice of Mrs. Paterno. [Correction: Ruth Brown was the granddaughter of Minnie Minton Middaugh Brown Paterno. Ruth’s father was Lyndon Middaugh Brown, son of Minnie and her first husband Rufus Lincoln Brown.] Then came a page, James A. Farley Jr., son of Postmaster General and Mrs. James A. Farley; the bride’s mother, who was matron of honor, and the bridge, who was escorted by her father to the altar, where she was joined by the bridegroom and his cousin, Boyd Brown, the best man.
The Bridal Costume
The bride wore an empire gown of white chiffon velvet, made with long, fitted sleeves and a full court train, rounded at the end. The gown was embellished with a dropped yoke of point lace. Her veil was of old rose point lace, and had been worn by the bridegroom’s mother at her twenty-fifth wedding anniversary [in 1931]. She carried a bouquet of white cattleya and butterfly orchids and pansies.
The flower girls wore Grecian frocks of pale pink velvet, with caps of the same material, trimmed with forget-me-nots and sweetheart roses, and carried colonial bouquets of the same flowers. The page was in a black velvet Eton suit. Mrs. Cotillo, the bride’s mother, wore a costume of white Florentine lace, embroidered in silver thread, and carried butterfly orchids in pastel shades.
After the ceremony the bridal couple received the congratulations of relatives and friends in the ballroom. They were assisted by the bride’s mother and Mrs. Paterno, the latter of whole wore a gown of silver cloth appliquéd in seed pearls and a corsage of white and purple orchids. Later there was dancing. A buffet supper was served by Sherry in the conservatory. The entire Paterno residence was thrown open for the festivities.
Official of the United States and Italian Governments, judges of various courts, members of the bar and other outstanding persons were invited to the wedding. Many of those unable to attend sent telegrams of congratulations, including Augusto Rosso, the Italian Ambassador, and Governor and Mrs. Herbert H. Lehman.
The Guests
Among those who accepted invitations were: Commendatore Nobile Antonio Grossari, Italian Consul General at New York, and Mrs. Grossari; Dr. Pierre Pasquale Spinelli, Deputy Consul, and Mrs. Spinelli; Postmaster General and Mrs. James A. Farley, former Governor and Mrs. Alfred E. Smith, former Ambassador James W. Gerard and Mrs. Gerard, Secretary of State Edward J. Flynn of New York and Mrs. Flynn, State Senator and Mrs. John J. Dunnigan, Judge and Mrs. George Murray Hulbert, Judge and Mrs. John C. Knox, Judge and Mrs. Martin T. Manton, Judge Edward R. Finch of the Court of Appeals and Mrs. Finch, Justice and Mrs. Edward J. Glennon, Justice and Mrs. Francis Martin, Justice and Mrs. James O’Malley, Justice and Mrs. Alfred H. Townley, Justice and Mrs. Irwin Untermyer, Justice William Harman Black, Justice and Mrs. Joseph M. Callahan, Justice and Mrs. John F. Carew, Justice and Mrs. Albert Cohn, Justice and Mrs. William T. Collins, Justice Edward S. Dore, Justice and Mrs. Alfred Frankenthaler, Justice and Mrs. Ernest E. L. Hammer, Justice Samuel H. Hofstadter, Justice Edward R. Koch, Justice and Mrs. Edgar J. Lauer, Justice and Mrs. Timothy A. Leary, Justice and Mrs. Aaron J. Levy, Justice Richard P. Lydon, Justice and Mrs. Philip J. McCook, Justice and Mrs. John E. McGeehan, Justice and Mrs. Edward J. McGoldrick, Justice and Mrs. Charles B. McLaughlin, Justice and Mrs. Julius Miller, Justice and Mrs. Kenneth O’Brien, Justice and Mrs. Samuel I. Rosenman, Justice and Mrs. Peter Schmuck, Justice Bernard L. Shientag, Justice and Mrs. Aron Steuer, Justice and Mrs. Louis A. Valenta, Justice and Mrs. John L. Walsh, Justice and Mrs. Isidor Wasservogel, Justice and Mrs. Charles C. Lockwood, Justice and Mrs. John H. McCooey, Surrogate and Mrs. James A. Delehanty and Surrogate and Mrs. James A. Foley.
Others were Representative and Mrs. Joseph A. Gavagan, Representative and Mrs. Martin J. Kennedy and Representative and Mrs. Vito Marcantonio, Public Welfare Commissioner Edward Corsi and Mrs. Corsi, Dr. Charles Amoroso, Deputy Commissioner of Correction and Mrs. Amoroso, Assistant Attorney General William J. Mahon, Controller-elect Frank J. Taylor and Mrs. Taylor, President Bernard S. Deutsch of the Board of Aldermen and Mrs. Deutsch, Borough President Samuel Levy of Manhattan and Mrs. Levy, District Attorney and Mrs. William Copeland Dodge, Commissioner of Public Works H. Warren Hubbard and Mrs. Hubbard, James J. Dooling, Frank Kelley, State Senator Thomas I. Sheridan and Mrs. Sheridan, former Sheriff John E. Sheehy and Mrs. Sheehy, Water Supply Commissioner John J. Dietz and Mrs. Dietz, Commissioner and Mrs. Edward P. Mulrooney, former Mayor and Mrs. John P. O’Brien, former Surrogate and Mrs. John P. Cohalan, George J. Ryan, president of the Board of Education, and Mrs. Ryan, Dr. and Mrs. Angelo Patri, Assistant District Attorney Felix Benvenga, Chief Magistrate James C. McDonald, Magistrate and Mrs. Thomas I. Aurelio, Judge and Mrs. Joseph F. Caponigri, Judge and Mrs. Morris Eder and Judge and Mrs. Myron Sulzberger.
Also Agnostino De Biasi, Italo Falbo, Marcello Girosi, Francesco Macaluso, Mr. and Mrs. Generosa Pope, Louis Wiley, Mr. and Mrs. Nathan Burkan, Mr. and Mrs. Charles A. Boston, Captain and Mrs. Irving L. Evans, Mr. and Mrs. Herman Goodstein, Dr. Joseph Kahn, Mr. and Mrs. George Z. Medalie, Mr. and Mrs. Ferdinand I. Pecora, Mr. and Mrs. Lloyd P. Stryker, Mr. and Mrs. Henry W. Taft, Mr. and Mrs. George W. Whiteside, Assemblyman and Mrs. Salvatore Farenga, Mr. and Mrs. Lucius Boomer, Mr. and Mrs. Howard Chandler Christy, Baron and Baroness Bernardino Gailuppi, Mr. and Mrs. Henry V. Allien, Mrs. and Mrs. Michael J. Delehanty, Mr. and Mrs. Charles Gerli, George Burling Prince and Dr. and Mrs. Martin Stein.
December 10th – Dear Judge and Mother, It was a grand surprise to hear your voices last night. It sort of made me feel that everything was alright. I do hope Sally is feeling better by now. Well Judge I’m afraid I don’t win my bet about Helen packing…
… my pants but she has tried very hard and is handling everything very well. You should see Helen checking over my laundry when she sends it out and when it returns. Now that’s a pretty good start. Of course I’ll admit it’s a hard job to get Helen to write. Helen’s excuse is that I keep her busy day and night…
… The trip on the Santa Elena was really most enjoyable and the various ports and cities that we visited were very interesting and great fun to see. Today we lunched at the Brown Derby the drove through Hollywood, Beverly Hills and Los Angeles. Tomorrow we are planning to visit some fo the studios….
… Helen has been grand and has put up with all my peculiar traits so far. Evidentially we will be married for years and years as we have started planning our golden anniversary. Much love to you all and again many thanks for all the cooperation in making our wedding such a success. Helen promises a long long letter tomorrow. Your son, Carlo
For Mother xxx For Judge xxx For Sally xxx For Aunt Hattie xxx For Uncle Bill xxx For Anna xxx
Darlings, That husband of mine has been at the desk for hours and I haven’t been able to write the letter I promised last night. PS – He doesn’t know how to spell any better than I do. But the worse he spells, the more I love him (if that is possible). Love to you all, xxxxxx Helen.
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